“ONE ON ONE”

9 “Argue your case with your neighbor himself, and do not reveal another's secret,”

Proverbs 25:9

Yesterday, we started a miniseries on church hurt. We kicked it off with a summary of the different levels of offense caused by the church. From this point on, we will be discussing practical steps toward overcoming church hurt.

Face the offender.

In today’s verse, King Solomon says it is best to keep personal conflicts as private as possible. He understands the importance of avoiding public shame (after having relationships with a thousand women, he probably learned his lesson).

From a practical standpoint, steering clear of a public scandal spares you from having a bad reputation. You don’t want to be the spreader of malicious accusations and permanently damage your friendship by involving others in something that should be dealt with privately.

You may think that it’s easier just to go away and forget, but that doesn’t work. The memories of your past and the pain they have caused you will linger in your heart and mind. So, set yourself free from that prison and face the person who hurt you. More importantly, try to keep it between the two of you—or keep the involved parties to as few people as possible.

This is a very practical piece of advice. It’s always best to keep personal rifts private to avoid public shame. It doesn’t matter who’s right; people will always have bad things to say about you. You may be tempted to divulge secrets to clear your name in an argument, but that might give people a wrong impression of you. You will end up being a gossip, and I’m sure you don’t want that.

Pursue the Savior today!